Wednesday, October 15, 2008

Tiny Thoughts # 1

I always dont understand why people who get married couldnt come out alone for yumcha session, why has to bring along the wife / husband. I also dont understand why people who pak toh has to bring along the girlfriend or the boyfriend for hanging out.
But now, I can totally understand why they do that. When you are attached to someone, you are not only physically attached to your partner, you are mentally attached to your partner as well. When your partner is not around (gone out with friends / outstation for work etc), you must be thinking what is he doing, how is he doing, has he eaten dinner or not, is he ok etc..... you are distracted from your daily work just thinking of him.
As for me, in this situation, I am thinking a lot of "WHAT IF". All these just happened so coincidentally:
- Boy boy last minute told me that he is going to Cameron with his colleagues for the 2 days Hari Raya Holidays.
- Last Friday night he went to pub to celebrate something with his colleagues.
- Saturday working whole day (mind you, saturday only half day work), then picked me up at 8pm to eat dinner with me.
- Sunday said not free whole day --> going to Klang to look at bodykit. Called him 4 times that day but 4 times also he said he is driving (whole day driving meh).
Now, i am starting to think .....
.... what if he is not in Klang looking at bodykit?
.... what if he is with another girl?
.... what if he lost interest in me?
.... what if he wanna dump me?
.... can I accept the fact?
I know I have confidence in him all these while (never doubt him before), but I do not have confidence in myself (as I am getting older you know). I just couldnt stop thinking of all these "what if". Thats the thing when you do not spend enough time with your partner and she feels negleted.
What will you do if you are in this situation?
By the way, I am fine now, he said I am too silly to think of all these things. He has my confidence. The best solution is to tell your feelings to your partner so that he can understand, do not keep in the heart.

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